Doing and Being
Sometimes I take my journal out on the patio first thing in the morning and sit with a cup of tea listening as my mind rambles all over the place, before it finally starts picking on me for not doing enough. Seriously.
Here’s a sampling of my mind ramblings: Why don’t moths fly to the moonlight? Where does conscious awareness go when the mind is tangled up in some fictitious rambling? Why is it so hard to be disciplined? I want more daily practices that matter; more daily practices that add value. I need to be more organized and schedule things into my day. (See how it all started out innocently, then turned to something entirely different?)
And then I begin my habit of list-making:
And I virtually fill my day with activities that are important to me. Things I love.
Things I need to get done. Soon there is such a long list of activities, there aren’t enough hours in a day to tend to them all.
But then the sun rises in the morning mist to a full chorus of birdsong & traffic sounds. I notice that the sound of the highway seems louder day by day. I hear orioles, brown thrashers, robins, red-winged blackbirds, house finches, wrens, bluebirds. I hear a nest of fledglings nearby in the wildwood. They go into a feeding frenzy every time an adult comes near. They sound like an angry nest of cicadas.
The black-eyed Susans and burgundy red lilies are opening against a backdrop of periwinkle delphiniums and deep fuchsia bee balm. The lavender, now in full bloom, is just starting its decline.
Quite the little Shangri-La! This is why I don’t fill my entire day with disciplines!
And tell me, what discipline, what activity could be more important than this? Than getting all this?
I love my mornings just the way they are. I love rising with my man, coming out on the patio for a few stretches, watch the morning blossom, drink it in like a tonic. This is what all my practices have always been about. Being here NOW, cultivating this kind of awareness, presence, waking up. Receiving this gift of beauty/love/life before it passes.
What matters is being fully alive.
What matters is listening well and embodying a high-level consciousness, awareness, love and appreciation.
A mourning dove coos. The anise hyssop is starting to blossom. And this came across my desk today:
Did you ever try to document even a moment of mind-stuff? It can be an eye-opener! Becoming familiar with your mind patterns is an effective way to develop a bit of objectivity with them.